During a recent coaching conversation, I discovered two words that make us more intentional.

The client's goal for the coaching call was to become more intentional in how she used her time - primarily related to how she spent time with her children and how she used her time to launch her own business.

At one point, I asked the client, "what gets in the way of being intentional with your time?" She listed a host of challenges, starting with some common phrases:

• I need to ...

• I should ...

• I can't ...

• Others tell me that ...

As she was going through the list, I asked her to pause for a moment. "I hear a lot about 'need,' and 'should,' and 'can't.' What if you were to use the word 'choose' here? Please fill in this blank for me: 'I choose to ....'"

As the client stated what she chose to do in her situation, her entire countenance changed. 

• She sat up taller. 

• Her shoulders relaxed. 

• A smile beamed from her face.

She had a significant insight - "I can choose to do things here. When I choose to do something, I'm being intentional."

She then listed what she would choose to do next to be more intentional with her time.

The client's challenge was not unique. I also struggle with an internal monologue of "I need ...," "I should ..., " and "I can't ..." While those are common words, they are also the language of someone who is being acted upon by the world around them. They are not in control; no wonder such language can make us feel anxious or out of control.

On the other hand, when I say, "I choose," I get to make decisions that matter. 

• I'm no longer at the beck and call of the world around me. 

• I become the hero in my own story. 

Simply put, I become "intentional." 

So what about you? What happens when you stop using words like "need," "should," and "can't"? What happens when you use the word "choose" more often.

Try it as a small experiment. Use the two words “I choose,” and see what happens.

For Reflection

If you want to become more intentional and make lasting positive changes, please schedule a free consultation. During our 45 minutes together, we will identify where you are now relative to your current big goals, what obstacles are in the way, and what you can do about them.